Do you ever have dreams where you’re falling? I do. And I usually wake up as soon as I start to fall. I physically jump, shake and take a deep breath… I’m okay! Thinking my muscles just needed to relax. Last week I had one that was a little different for all the other ones that I’ve had before. I…
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Contrary to what most of us believe about abuse… and even “domestic violence“… the sight of a woman who’s being punched in the face and kicked in the ribs while her husband threatens to kill her is not the only form. That would be at the extreme end of a spectrum known as partner abuse. Most abusers never have to hit,…
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Before I married, I was a confident and carefree woman. I was working for a large newspaper as a circulation manager with employees under me. I was moving my way up in the company, that appreciated the work that I was doing. And although I had some normal female insecurities, I wasn’t really worried about what people thought of me,…
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If an unwanted divorce is not enough to be dealing with many of us women are dealing with a toxic family of origin as well. I’ve been coaching and mentoring women through the divorce recovery journey for over four years now. In my experience, I’ve only coached a couple ladies who did not have problems with their birth family as…
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Why do I have to be going through a divorce? Why didn’t my husband stay faithful? Why doesn’t God make my husband change? Why doesn’t God fix my marriage? Why does God allow these bad things to happen to faithful Christians? We’ve all thought these or similar things during and after divorce. They are very normal thoughts and feelings, for…
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After the first physical affair had ended (in late Fall 2002), the other woman (OW) called our house (no cell phones at the time). She seemed shocked that I answered. But immediately started stuttering out that she wanted to apologize for what she had done and ask for my forgiveness. I was still very angry about the betrayal and didn’t…
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In 2002 and then again in 2009, I was told by pastors that I had the power to “love him into repentance.” The message was I could save my marriage, single-handedly, and God would bless me greatly for it. [While fervently reading and highlighting, The Power of a Praying Wife.] Thankfully one of these churches has since stopped giving this…
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He packed his clothes and went to his parent’s house for Christmas. At first, he said he wanted us all to go with him. But I couldn’t pretend everything was okay to please them anymore. They didn’t understand or even care about the emotional roller coaster that we were on. And I knew my lack of a fake smile would…
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A couple of months ago, after moving, I could barely get out of bed without pain and stiffness. I probably looked like I was 80 years old when I walked – I’m sure even some 80-year-olds looked better than I did. After seeing my doctor, I was ordered to start physical therapy several days a week because my lower back…
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Authentic: true to one’s own personality, spirit, or character; is sincere and authentic with no pretensions (Source) A couple years after my divorce I embarked on a year plus of working on being more authentic. I had spent far too long following what others wanted that I had lost who I really was and what I really wanted for my…
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